How to Adopt
Children
Types of Children available for Adoption
Children are referred to us from Local Authorities all over the UK. Some children are referred by the National Adoption Register and the West Midlands Consortium.
The children are normally aged 0-11 years. Some of them are featured in the family finding publications Be My Parent and Adoption Today and we encourage you to subscribe to these.
There are very few healthy white babies available for adoption. There are single children and groups of brothers and sisters who need to stay together.
The names of the children below have been changed - but they illustrate the types of children who need to be adopted.
Mark and David
Brothers from a white, Irish Catholic family. Mark aged eight, is an affectionate, energetic boy who has a talent for music and is a keen footballer. Mark needs some extra help in school because he was rarely sent to school in the past and he can be an angry little boy at times.
David aged two is a lively, happy toddler who is meeting his developmental milestones. The boys’ birth family life was chaotic and there were some unexplained injuries to both boys. Mark and David were placed in an adoptive family but this had to end, through no fault of the boys and Mark is keen to move to a new family. There will be letter-box contact with their birth parents and contact
with their grandmother.
Some children are healthy and some have health problems ranging from mild to severe. A severe physical disability might affect the child’s mobility, intellectual development and ability to achieve full independence as an adult.
Some children are reaching all their developmental milestones and some are delayed in all aspects of their development. Others may be delayed in certain aspects like speech and language.
Some children are academically able and some have mild learning difficulties and may need extra help in the classroom. Some children have severe learning difficulties and need the specialist facilities provided by a special school.
Marcey
Marcey aged eight months has a sunny nature and is developing extremely well. Her birth mother is an Asian Muslim student studying at university.
Although her boyfriend has supported her, the family will not accept her baby and do not approve of the relationship.
Marcey needs Asian Muslim adopters.
There may be incomplete medical background information on the child’s birth family. In some cases we don't know who the birth father is, and this could have implications for the child’s health and identity. Some children have experienced physical neglect or abuse. This can be emotional, physical or sexual.
Chantelle
Aged six, her mother is white English and her father is white English/Pakistani, his great grandfather originated from Pakistan. Her half brother, Tyrone, aged three is white English. They are the youngest in a sibling group of six children who all have different fathers.
They are in care due to neglect by their birth mother. Chantelle and Tyrone were left in the care of their older siblings and several other people and may have been exposed to sexual activities. Chantelle is fun loving and academically able. She is not dry at night and has daytime accidents.
Tyrone is an intelligent, robust and happy child. His speech is delayed and he will need speech therapy. Chantelle and Tyrone need to keep in touch with their older siblings who are placed in long term foster homes.
Some children have not experienced abuse or neglect and come into the care system because older siblings have been abused or neglected. All children available for adoption have experienced loss and separation from their birth family. Their capacity to trust adults is likely to be impaired.
Children express their angry and sad feelings about what has happened to them through a variety of behaviours. They may be quiet, timid, withdrawn, verbally or physically aggressive, destructive with their own and other people’s possessions, and want to be in control.
Most children need to maintain some form of contact with significant people from their past. This could be with brothers and sisters placed separately, birth relatives and foster carers. Contact can take place by letter or face-to-face meetings. The adoptive parents are involved in any face-to-face contact with the child’s original family members.You will be able to explore the kind and level of contact that feels right for you.
Christopher
White, English origins. Christopher, aged 15 months has been in his foster home since he was two days old and is a lively, active boy who is generally healthy and developing normally.
He is the youngest of four children and his older brothers and sisters are placed together in a permanent foster home as their mother neglected their care.
Children become available for adoption due to either the birth parents requesting adoption or the child being removed from the birth parents by a court order on the grounds of neglect or abuse. In these cases attempts will have been made to rehabilitate the child to the birth family, which have failed.
Most children come from families who have experienced a combination of problems:
- poverty
- unemployment
- alcohol and or drug dependency
- domestic violence
- mental ill health
- physical ill health
- lack of support
- learning difficulties
- poor parenting.
Some parents have been abused or neglected in their own childhood or the child may have been born with a severe disability and the parents feel unable to cope. These factors culminate in the child’s needs being ignored or inadequately met and form the background for abuse and neglect.
Dan, Amee and Tom
White, English siblings who come from a background of neglect due to their mother’s alcohol dependency.
There is a history of marital violence between the birth parents.
The birth father is a drug user and his whereabouts are unknown.
Dan aged aged seven is delayed in his speech and has an educational statement; this means he receives extra help in mainstream school where he is making steady progress and beginning to gain confidence with his peer group.
Amee is a timid child. She has settled well in her foster home but shows signs of anxiety when she hears raised voices.
Tom is meeting all his developmental
milestones and has a sunny personality.
There are white children, black children and children of mixed parentage. We try to match the child’s ethnicity, cultural and religious heritage with their adoptive family - and for this reason we need adopters who are white, black, Asian and mixed parentage, and of all faiths or no faith.
When it isn't possible to find an exact match, the adoptive family will need to demonstrate ways that they can help their child to grow with a positive sense of who they are, and where they come from.
For example - if white adopters are considering a child of mixed parentage - the adopters would need to show that their family lifestyle would include friends or neighbours who reflect the child’s identity. In this way the child will be helped to grow into a community where they feel they ‘belong’.
All the children are different, so it is important to identify the children you feel you would be able to parent. It can feel overwhelming at this stage but you will receive guidance throughout your home study and preparation group training.