I was married before. Our divorce was acrimonious, and my ex-wife blames my current wife for the breakup of our marriage, because of our affair. Will you contact her? We seek a number of references from people who know you well, and this includes significant previous partners. However, we will talk to you about your specific circumstances and decide how best to get the information we need. We need references because we must be as satisfied as possible that the child’s new parents will keep them safe and well. An ex-partner will obviously know someone very well, and would be able to tell us if they were worried about a child’s safety. If you had children with your ex-wife then we will need to get a reference.